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Dealing With Uncertainty!


Sitting on my comfortable couch, musing with my favorite melody of my mindfulness app, in my quarantine room while admiring the glooming winter rain; I was overwhelmed with uncertainty that took over my mind. The experience I went through during the last few days and the intense transition that came in my life has left a lasting impression which makes me frown and smile, both at the same time. After travelling for an extremely long twenty four hours and throwing myself into a seemingly never ending twenty one days quarantine, I was delusional, apprehensive, unsettled and terribly homesick. On the surface, through my stories and social media posts, everyone obviously assumed that I was having the best time of my life. However, the ground reality at my end was entirely different, rather opposite. Anyone travelling during corona times can very well relate to what I must have been going through and, in fact, still facing. Well! I would not like to go into the details of the situations I faced, since my purpose of writing this is to talk about dealing with your emotions when you’re completely thrown out of your comfort zone and your anxious thoughts drag you towards a hopeless black hole. When you are in such a situation, the first thing that happens is a loss of sense of control, that makes you feel that you are at the back seat of your life. Your defense mechanism gets activated and you experience panic due to heightened adrenaline, and the worst that could happen is that you turn to overthinking and start suffering self-inflicted pain. All this puts you into a depressive state of mind and you want to quit everything and run back to your comfort zone, as what you need the most in such times is the warmth of your harmless, familiar, comfort zone.

One thing which I really dislike about modern times is the perception that you should stay bold, unshaken, and prevent yourself from expressing your truest emotions. People now-a-days say, “don’t cry if you’re sad”, “don’t ask for emotional help if you’re hurt” as this will show that you’re weak and such emotions are not the definition of strong men and women. Huh! Seriously? This is similar to expecting, “don’t laugh when you’re happy”, “don’t dance when you’re excited”, “don’t feel a sense of achievement on reaching your milestones”, “don’t love when you're in a loving mood'' or even “don’t eat when you’re hungry.” Did it feel rational? No, right? Then, why to say that strong souls should not feel vulnerable. In reality, strong souls are those who aren't scared to feel vulnerable, who accept that there are certain situations which might not make them feel their best or fullest. They have the courage to express their plight and genuine emotions just as they do when they are experiencing their best of times. Strong souls never give up, they may feel lonely, suffer rejection, be traumatized beyond a point, but eventually emerge stronger, shinier, and soar higher!

To regain your lost sense of control, you must try to do things that console you and remind you that things are not that weird and you are still in your comfort zone. In such situations, your family and loved ones can be your biggest gifts since, in reality, they have the warmth you need the most. Frequent interactions with them and outpouring your emotions before them will give you comfort and revive your spirits. It’s a sad reality that we fail to understand the pivotal role our family plays in providing us social security and a sense of belonging. Therefore, now is the time, this is the right time to tell your family, your mom, your dad and everyone else, how much you love them and how complete you feel when you’re with them. Believe me, the world will remember you, please you as long as you’re of any use to them. Once you’re out of context, irrelevant and no more useful to the world, it will forget you. Hence, it’s futile to sacrifice your family for such a heartless and selfish world. On the other hand, your family will revere you, endure you, accept you even when the world will no longer recognize you. The timeless lesson of “family first” that our ancestors have passed onto us is most relevant in times like now.

And lastly, embracing what you’re going through as a conspiracy of the universe to prepare you for a higher purpose for which you need the lessons, skills, wisdom and knowledge this present moment will teach you! I have written this many-a-times, and I would reiterate it here that “magic happens to those who believe in it!” Therefore, be patient in the pursuit of excellence and enjoy the journey as much as you would relish the fruit of your efforts! Also, remember, though it’s important to carry your emotions, you must also know to drop those emotions when it feels too heavy for you to take right decisions in life which will fetch you long lasting happiness.

Anyways, the rain has already stopped and the ray of hope in the form of bright sunlight is piercing through the thin layer of clouds over Hong Kong island, and I am in no mood to miss the view! Time to bid adieu!

-Shreyash Sharma

 

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