I was in a midst of a very ugly voyage. I wasn't sure of how long can I hold on to it. Of how far can I reach till I breakdown, tear apart my silences and scream out the truth. I wasn't sure if I really wanted to stay. I wasn't sure whether saying something and not actually feeling the same results in nothing else but being heartbroken! And if that was the truth, if being heartbroken is what was getting imbibed from the beginning, I rather chose to break my own heart before anybody else does! I rather chose to give up the affection, the attachment, the firsts and the lasts of our crispy clumsy moments, the edges of our promises and the corridors that now carry nothing but just 'memories!' If memories are the only one I'm supposed to live with, then I choose to walk away from the front, holding onto a smile and praying for the best for all of us. Because the darkest spot within our head is the one that hides the truth! Nobody amongst us is actually aware of the hidden reality but we are very well conscious of each other.
It gets darker and suffocating as we start compromising. May it be a compromise with situations, with people or with our instincts. We keep pushing the days away but hold onto what remains in photographs of past. We keep struggling to smile for days but laugh at memories that have been created long back. Then we know, we got to call it for closure;
Afterall, friendships and relationships need to keep us alive in our present, not in our memories!"
- Vaishnavi Bajpai
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